False Intimacy: Probing the Illusion

False Intimacy: Probing the Illusion

Living Free Every Day®
A ministry of LivingFree.org

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Today's Scripture

"I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who infuses inner strength into me; I am self-sufficient in Christ’s sufficiency]." (Philippians 4:13 AMP)

Thoughts for Today

Yesterday we discussed the illusion of intimacy. Sometimes we create our own illusion. But there's big money in that illusion and the porn industry works vigorously to create and enhance it. Why are so many of us taken in by it?

The illusion appeals to our core sexuality. It offers us a relationship without requiring us to relate to a person. A fantasy relationship is controlled and cannot surprise us. A fantasy relationship does not force us to give up our own wants and desires.

The women (or men) working in the industry know what to say and how to act interested and caring. They may appear to give the respect that is so hungered for. They will act out fantasies.

In chat rooms people can hide behind false names and pretend to be someone they aren't. Relationships can be ended with a click, so there is no real commitment.

Consider this …

With men and women who have affairs or pick up partners at bars or other places, the same dynamic is often in play. One-night stands obviously are times of intense attraction and sexual release followed by the reality of their shallowness.

Individuals in an ongoing affair may have deeper conversations than with their spouses, but the relationship is built on lies and deceit. Willingness to cheat on a spouse reveals a high level of selfishness. Because they are built on selfishness, affairs rarely last. The intimacy is an illusion since the individuals are more interested in their own personal needs than in the well-being of the other.

Do you recognize yourself in any of this? Maybe you haven't acted out your desires yet but have been considering it. Or maybe you are deeply involved. Don't try to resist it on your own. Don't try to find freedom on your own. Alone, you may not be able to find victory . . . but all things are possible with Jesus.


Father, I realize the things I've been doing are wrong, and I'm beginning to see how selfish they are. Please forgive me. I don't think I can stop on my own, but I thank you that I can do all things through Christ. In his name . . .

These thoughts were drawn from …

Crossroads: Choosing the Road to Sexual Purity
by David E. Longacre. Crossroads deals with choosing the road to sexual purity and is suggested for use in support groups and Christian counseling.

  • Describes the sexual addiction process
  • Shows how the sin of proximity often precedes sexual sins
  • Shows the way out of sexual addiction
  • Presents biblical insights to help a person break free and stay free
  • Gives practical actions for renewing the mind
  • Serves as a powerful evangelistic tool by providing a way to minister to people's felt needs and then pointing them to Christ

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